Wondering why I have been quiet?
It’s quite a challenge to write something really good, especially when I am trying to avoid writing about people. It’s just in the nature of the human being to gossip, and talk about people, or make fun about people, regardless that it might lead to something bad. In fact, some people put pride in talking bad about people, when actually, we don’t realize that when we do that, it reflects that we have low dignity, because we are being less respectful to ourselves and to the rest.
It is sad as well as ironic that when Muslims are taught that gossiping is a very grave sin, but you and me, we do it anyway. We don’t really try to at least to minimize our habit of talking bad and making fun about people, whether they are our friend, or foe. And to add to that irony, the issue that we’re gossiping about will never change if we just gossip about it, and it could’ve been improved if we communicate respectfully and politely, with our most sincere concern, to the person of the matter.
What do I learn from this?
That I am also guilty of doing the same.
There is no point of pointing people’s fault especially when it was yesterday’s issue, and nothing and no one will change.
That constantly magnifying people’s bad deeds will only exhaust my energy and give my unnecessary attention to them. (thanks to a friend who highlighted this to me)
That, to talk less about people, is not a piece of cake. We are always tempted to talk about people because it feels fun and/or funny, it does make us feel that we're “better” than the victim we talk about.
This is a practice that I have to do over and over again. Whenever I feel like gossiping, I have to remember that it doesn’t do any good.
It doesn’t matter if the victim of the gossip is truly the person to be blamed. As long as there’s no difference in talking bad about the person, it is considered gossip.
On my side, if I realize that I am the subject of people’s gossip and I feel upset, I should see whether the issue is applicable for me or not. Like I said, it’s a nature for people to gossip, so I must learn to give up that feeling. As long as it doesn’t affect my growth, let them have the leisure to talk.
For me to advise a person, that should be in the interest of the person’s benefit and request, if not, I don’t intrude. For me to ask a person’s favor to change, it is only when the person’s act is critically and physically affecting me.
By reminding myself this, I can be a better person.