declaring it peace

I admit that I still have this lingering effect after my decision of refusing the orchestra management job.
It feels like an ex partner, with a faint anger and dissatisfaction.

But I have to admit that by being that, I am trying to get away from being responsible of it.
Perhaps I am trying to blame someone, something, or the situation itself.

I'm now declaring peace.
Declining the job was totally my decision.
And it doesn't make me anything less than I am.
In fact, somehow or rather, I was indirectly being recognized by the prestigious orchestra-
the moment they wanted to hire me into the team.
And in this small industry, I might bump into them again.

So. Case closed. Not going to look back.

One says, when you cut down a branch, a few shoots will grow.
After a week of the huge decision,
Suddenly my schedule became even tight.

Both orchestras that I am joining are going to have concerts-
one in July and the other in August.

Pieces are tough.
And actually, I am stealing time to type this on a weekend.
Because, my weekends are fully-booked for rehearsals.

Will update soon!


Calvin said...

Don't worry. Of course you will have this lingering effect of thinking whether you made the right decision or not. It's normal. After each decision we made, we will consider whether we have taken the right move or not.

If you're ardent in performing more than managing a team, then I'm sure staying as a member of the orchestra will be happier for you. If I were you, I will prefer to play and perform. The satisfaction and feedback/applause from the audience is priceless.

::airswift:: said...

thanks for the support.
it's the correct decision anyway =)

i lost a nice job,
but i still have a nice current job
and a passion that i live on.