It's Z's birthday today.
The roads were all blocked so I couldn't get a cake for him. (Can or not my excuse?)
Anyway. Happy birthday to the special person in my life.
my weakness in the office; revealed
There was one day I was not efficient and not really useful at work.
I was really hooked up chatting on the net, to the extent that I felt that the time awkwardly passing really fast.
There was crisis in the air and I was trying to settle it via chat.
And then even one student who sat next to me and I assisted her while chatting, said to me and smiled:
“Wow, you look kinda busy.”
It became too obvious because I was like stationed on a PC for quite a while and smiled to myself whenever a funny dialog took place in the chat window.
Only then when it’s almost five in the evening, my direct boss came to me and said:
“Do you mind not chatting? If not, I am not going to continue hire you.”
That was like a huge slap to my face.
And another colleague reported to me that actually all the permanent senior staff noticed my wrongdoing and was not really happy about it.
On the next day, I vowed to myself not to chat online anymore. However, whenever there was no student to cater with, I wanted to check my mails and post an online entry perhaps.
The line was really terrible; we technically couldn’t access the Internet at all. The only sites that we could enter were those related to students registering, such as the university’s internal registration sites, and the online banking sites like Maybank and CIMB.
I was really upset because what I saw was that the boss blocked most access to the internet and I think it’s not really fair to everyone else too that you have to sit idle, not doing anything whenever your work load is done.
And then suddenly when I read the news online, I realized that the problem of the network was not intended.
There was an earthquake in China which caused damage to a main optic cable which stretches 19,000 kilometers long. This is a main cable; which channels the Internet flow between the Asian region and the Western countries.
Just after viewing that, the boss came to me and gave me a lecture on my working attitude. Two words can conclude it all: CHAT and LATE.
I was really discouraged and as I dwell with what she said to me, and what my friends see me as, I felt really bad. I see myself as a useless spoilt person and I felt just like running across the highway and get knocked off by a huge truck and-
It’s hard to be in a situation when you are being blamed and it’s your fault, and you admit and realize that.
I called Z and he told me to see it as a way for me to grow.
As I keep on contemplating of it, at the end I could see the source of it all. I had let myself astray and did not try to wake up before the sun goes up to do my first duty as a Moslem-
To be amongst the other believers along the same time zone to do the Subuh prayer.
To start the day doing my obligation to God would give me a place for His blessings throughout the whole day.
What my boss said was right, on my working attitude. Perhaps I could start by being punctual.
I was really hooked up chatting on the net, to the extent that I felt that the time awkwardly passing really fast.
There was crisis in the air and I was trying to settle it via chat.
And then even one student who sat next to me and I assisted her while chatting, said to me and smiled:
“Wow, you look kinda busy.”
It became too obvious because I was like stationed on a PC for quite a while and smiled to myself whenever a funny dialog took place in the chat window.
Only then when it’s almost five in the evening, my direct boss came to me and said:
“Do you mind not chatting? If not, I am not going to continue hire you.”
That was like a huge slap to my face.
And another colleague reported to me that actually all the permanent senior staff noticed my wrongdoing and was not really happy about it.
On the next day, I vowed to myself not to chat online anymore. However, whenever there was no student to cater with, I wanted to check my mails and post an online entry perhaps.
The line was really terrible; we technically couldn’t access the Internet at all. The only sites that we could enter were those related to students registering, such as the university’s internal registration sites, and the online banking sites like Maybank and CIMB.
I was really upset because what I saw was that the boss blocked most access to the internet and I think it’s not really fair to everyone else too that you have to sit idle, not doing anything whenever your work load is done.
And then suddenly when I read the news online, I realized that the problem of the network was not intended.
There was an earthquake in China which caused damage to a main optic cable which stretches 19,000 kilometers long. This is a main cable; which channels the Internet flow between the Asian region and the Western countries.
Just after viewing that, the boss came to me and gave me a lecture on my working attitude. Two words can conclude it all: CHAT and LATE.
I was really discouraged and as I dwell with what she said to me, and what my friends see me as, I felt really bad. I see myself as a useless spoilt person and I felt just like running across the highway and get knocked off by a huge truck and-
It’s hard to be in a situation when you are being blamed and it’s your fault, and you admit and realize that.
I called Z and he told me to see it as a way for me to grow.
As I keep on contemplating of it, at the end I could see the source of it all. I had let myself astray and did not try to wake up before the sun goes up to do my first duty as a Moslem-
To be amongst the other believers along the same time zone to do the Subuh prayer.
To start the day doing my obligation to God would give me a place for His blessings throughout the whole day.
What my boss said was right, on my working attitude. Perhaps I could start by being punctual.
what i am feeling now
Staring blankly at the computer screen.
Not knowing how to type because everything seem to be confusing and it’s hard to validate and view different clashing opinions of the same thing.
I leave it to time to decide what happens next.
nothing much to update.
Last night was the first time me and Z went together hitting a club downtown.
Z is not the type that would hit the dance floor. He would just prefer stand aside, watching me enjoying myself in the center of the club.
His way of enjoying is to watch the scene quietly and see people enjoy themselves. That’s kinda weird but that’s how he is. Haha.
That night he slept over but he went back early at four. I woke up when the sun is up and suddenly missed him. Hmm..
Anyway. Today I went to the mall to buy some groceries alone. And then I went to buy some currypuff and ice-cream at Ikea alone. I happily ate the ice-cream, walking along the mall alone. Hey, being alone is fun sometimes.
There was this Chinese boy, he was trying a bit too hard to be cool. He wore a cap sideways and baggy t shirt and pants. And then suddenly I heard him ordering at the food counter:
“I wan fai ice-cream. Gimi wa-more ho-dock.”
(I want five ice-cream. Give me one more hot dog).
I was amused.
And then a friend came over and paid our lunch at Uncle Lim’s. I am so happy!
After lunch he still wanted to get some tit bits, so he entered the pastry shop nearby.
Written under a few trays of different buns:
The bun name: Are you nuts?
The description: The answer is no, if you fall in love with peanut butter.
The bun name: Tuna Turner
The description: This is not a singer.
Haha. Weird ways people do to promote their stuff.
Z is not the type that would hit the dance floor. He would just prefer stand aside, watching me enjoying myself in the center of the club.
His way of enjoying is to watch the scene quietly and see people enjoy themselves. That’s kinda weird but that’s how he is. Haha.
That night he slept over but he went back early at four. I woke up when the sun is up and suddenly missed him. Hmm..
Anyway. Today I went to the mall to buy some groceries alone. And then I went to buy some currypuff and ice-cream at Ikea alone. I happily ate the ice-cream, walking along the mall alone. Hey, being alone is fun sometimes.
There was this Chinese boy, he was trying a bit too hard to be cool. He wore a cap sideways and baggy t shirt and pants. And then suddenly I heard him ordering at the food counter:
“I wan fai ice-cream. Gimi wa-more ho-dock.”
(I want five ice-cream. Give me one more hot dog).
I was amused.
And then a friend came over and paid our lunch at Uncle Lim’s. I am so happy!
After lunch he still wanted to get some tit bits, so he entered the pastry shop nearby.
Written under a few trays of different buns:
The bun name: Are you nuts?
The description: The answer is no, if you fall in love with peanut butter.
The bun name: Tuna Turner
The description: This is not a singer.
Haha. Weird ways people do to promote their stuff.
i was famous
Last night I went to another birthday party. A friend that I knew quite sometime from the net wanted me to tag along to a birthday invitation that he got, venued at this condo in Keramat.
From the entrance, we could detect the condo unit since we could see green and white pieces of cloth being tied at the balcony like huge ribbons, and the house was bright.
I did not expect the party to be spectacular but it was. From the entrance I could see at least fifty pair of shoes and they put small tea lights at the sides of the walls.
As I entered, we had to wear stickers on our shirt, with our names on it, like a paper name tag.
There were a lot of people that I knew attended the party. It was a join venture party of four birthday boys, they even hired a party planner.
I saw one famous blogger who likes to post up his artsy photography in his blog. Confirmed that he is one of us. He looked quite petite in real life.
And there was a guy from my past and he avoided talking to me.
Super juniors and super seniors of my high school were there.
A friend of a friend whom I used to dance with were there too.
There were also familiar faces from the tv and magazine.
It’s like a party being attended by representatives of different groups of the people in this world.
Basically all of them were presentable that night, but non really caught my interest. Perhaps because they are of the same race of me. It’s just me and my preference.
And then the games began.
We had to dance and stop like statues when the music was stopped. Anyone who caught moving will lose in the game. The hosts, they were really trying their best to make people laugh so that they will be selected out of the game.
I remained serious and tried thinking of sad and angry thoughts, and I was one of the final five who won.
In the second game, a baton was passed from one person to the other while the music was played. When they stopped playing the music, the person who was still having the baton in his hand would have to randomly take out one note from a jar. He will have to act what is written in the note.
Some had to do naughty acts. Some had to pretend to flirt with someone.
But when the baton stopped in my hand, the note written there was:
You will be blind folded and spinned. You will have to choose one of the people here and kiss the person at the lips.
Darned. I had to kiss. A very. Fat. Old. Caucassian. Traumatized.
Anyway, I kept myself cool.
After that, the next game was like this. The host randomly pick a name from another jar, and those people whom their name being picked, had to wear heels (provided by them) and do a cat walk. My friend was one of the victim. Haha.
Next. A few groups consisted of four members were randomly picked using the jar again. These groups will have to choose one member to be a drag queen.
I was in one of those groups.
No, sorry to make you guys dissapointed, it was not me who was chosen to be a drag queen that night. Haha.
I was a bit suspicious. How come all selections were made randomly, but everytime my name was up?
Maybe it was just me, but that night I have a feeling that I was like hot stuff and everyone was eyeing me. Moreover when I was wearing the right shirt and jeans that improved the way I look that night.
It was a really wow party, partly because of the wild games, the crazy loud hosts, the delicious food, the fabulous people who came there, and also that I intepreted that people really looked at me and try to go and approach me.
I was like Cinderella, the gay version. I came latest to the party, and everyone was checking me out. This time I admit it. It felt good to be confident sometimes.
Z should be proud having me. Haha!
But after came back home, took a shower and looked at myself, I am just a human with thin hair. I was so worried if my hair is getting less and less.
I took out all my old collection of digital photos.
I examined them and finally I discovered something about myself.
My hair was not thinning. IT IS ACTUALLY THIN at the first place. I do have less hair compared to anyone else, but only recently I noticed that fact.
Yeah, I am just a small dot in Damansara. I am just a human, like anybody else.
From the entrance, we could detect the condo unit since we could see green and white pieces of cloth being tied at the balcony like huge ribbons, and the house was bright.
I did not expect the party to be spectacular but it was. From the entrance I could see at least fifty pair of shoes and they put small tea lights at the sides of the walls.
As I entered, we had to wear stickers on our shirt, with our names on it, like a paper name tag.
There were a lot of people that I knew attended the party. It was a join venture party of four birthday boys, they even hired a party planner.
I saw one famous blogger who likes to post up his artsy photography in his blog. Confirmed that he is one of us. He looked quite petite in real life.
And there was a guy from my past and he avoided talking to me.
Super juniors and super seniors of my high school were there.
A friend of a friend whom I used to dance with were there too.
There were also familiar faces from the tv and magazine.
It’s like a party being attended by representatives of different groups of the people in this world.
Basically all of them were presentable that night, but non really caught my interest. Perhaps because they are of the same race of me. It’s just me and my preference.
And then the games began.
We had to dance and stop like statues when the music was stopped. Anyone who caught moving will lose in the game. The hosts, they were really trying their best to make people laugh so that they will be selected out of the game.
I remained serious and tried thinking of sad and angry thoughts, and I was one of the final five who won.
In the second game, a baton was passed from one person to the other while the music was played. When they stopped playing the music, the person who was still having the baton in his hand would have to randomly take out one note from a jar. He will have to act what is written in the note.
Some had to do naughty acts. Some had to pretend to flirt with someone.
But when the baton stopped in my hand, the note written there was:
You will be blind folded and spinned. You will have to choose one of the people here and kiss the person at the lips.
Darned. I had to kiss. A very. Fat. Old. Caucassian. Traumatized.
Anyway, I kept myself cool.
After that, the next game was like this. The host randomly pick a name from another jar, and those people whom their name being picked, had to wear heels (provided by them) and do a cat walk. My friend was one of the victim. Haha.
Next. A few groups consisted of four members were randomly picked using the jar again. These groups will have to choose one member to be a drag queen.
I was in one of those groups.
No, sorry to make you guys dissapointed, it was not me who was chosen to be a drag queen that night. Haha.
I was a bit suspicious. How come all selections were made randomly, but everytime my name was up?
Maybe it was just me, but that night I have a feeling that I was like hot stuff and everyone was eyeing me. Moreover when I was wearing the right shirt and jeans that improved the way I look that night.
It was a really wow party, partly because of the wild games, the crazy loud hosts, the delicious food, the fabulous people who came there, and also that I intepreted that people really looked at me and try to go and approach me.
I was like Cinderella, the gay version. I came latest to the party, and everyone was checking me out. This time I admit it. It felt good to be confident sometimes.
Z should be proud having me. Haha!
But after came back home, took a shower and looked at myself, I am just a human with thin hair. I was so worried if my hair is getting less and less.
I took out all my old collection of digital photos.
I examined them and finally I discovered something about myself.
My hair was not thinning. IT IS ACTUALLY THIN at the first place. I do have less hair compared to anyone else, but only recently I noticed that fact.
Yeah, I am just a small dot in Damansara. I am just a human, like anybody else.
now i can feel it already
I remembered when I was 15, I had this mysterious itch all over my body and it lasted for months. I scratched and scratched each and every day until the scratch went deep and blood came out. My friend witness me suffering it, I could not sleep well, and ended up exhausted and fall asleep lying on the table in the study room in my dorm. It came to a point that I got used to it, I can even march with my brass band in the middle of the field with mosquitos and long grass that made everyone itch, but I did not fidget a bit.
Yesterday I got this different kind of discomfort that made me difficult to go to sleep.
One day after the incident that I fell of my bike, suddenly I felt the impact of the accident.
My whole body is aching everywhere, and the stinging pain can be felt at each cut and bruise.
The ache starts from the muscle at my back between my neck and my left shoulder. It goes down to the left ribs, in front and at the back. It also goes up to my left side of my head, where I am having like a headache.
The cuts that I have, besides the left palm, is the one down at the right foot, and at the right thigh. The slight sting kept on coming all night long.
So all these were not serious but made me quite stressed out because I could not sleep well.
Thank goodness I am feeling a bit better today.
Zuo tian wan shang, wo dedao yige SMS.
Yesterday morning, I get one SMS.
Zhe ge SMS xie zhongwen. Wo bu hui kan(dong) zhongwen.
This SMS written Chinese. I tak boleh read Chinese.
Wo hui kan pinyin.
I can read pinyin.
Wo xiang na ge ren gei SMS bu dui / cuo ren le.
I think that person give SMS wrong person already.
one step towards my dream
When someone passes me a piece of the above box, folded into two sections, would that make me happy?
Indeed it would, if there is something nice in between the folds.
For my case, I recieved a parcel of my music scores from London, protected between two thick sheets of brown cardboard. I have waited since before I knew Z, and that was like two months ago.
These scores are a part of the syllabus for trumpet grade 8. I have photocopied them, and I have tried playing them for the first time. One of the scores, Tico-Tico, is really a nice catchy song.
I also have downloaded a few pieces I discovered from the internet, that I did not imagine that I could retrieve them so easily. I printed them all.
This is one more step towards improving myself in my passion of playing my trumpet.
Me so happy, having my own quality collection of trumpet scores.
cute lil' things
Last night my housemate had a choir rehearsal at our apartment, so I went out to One Utama.
I walked the whole mall, seeing a lot of stuff. I also happily bought myself one Mexican bun from Roti Boy, munching it as I walk. Even one bun seems to be luxury food for me, nowadays.
I miss eating KFC, I miss eating Ikea meatballs, I miss eating at Uncle Lim's.
So I walked for two whole hours and guess what did I buy?
A pair of blue Tollyjoy socks, fit for a newborn baby.
Am I becoming a father? Goodness no.
Am I giving these to a friend's baby shower? That was way long ago.
So what can a person like me be doing with a pair of baby socks?
I used it as a bag for my mp3 player.Yeah. They don't sell any sachets small enough to protect my mp3 player.
still talking about it
Yeah, this is the picture of the cut I have at my left palm. Pretty bad, huh? Until today it's not drying up yet. No swimming for today again. Sigh.
I went up the hill where I skidded today. Well, it's my favorite entrance to the university after all. There were no signs of the accident. A few things were supposed to be on the ground, like a swimming coupon and a helmet buckle that I did not bother to pick up. Perhaps the janitor was doing her job, sweeping all tracks away.
Today I came late to the office and someone had eaten away my part from the free breakfast. Grumble.
something shocking
Life is very vulnerable.
You can lose it so easily.
But for those who always wanted to die, no matter what you say,
Life is so precious and can be changed to be better if you believe and try.
I thought my life was so bad recently with not enough money to survive, but I changed my thoughts when there was a jam at LDP highway, towards KJ. One lorry was stationary in the middle of the road, with a mutilated bike near it's front tires. And when I rode my bike pass it, there was a girl, lying down, in her pretty pink and peach dress, and it was soaked with blood below the abs. I really hope she'd made it through.
And today.
I read this entry written by this 'queen' who drove and witnessed a fresh accident.
Two school teens, cousins, were speeding on their bike, overtaking all cars recklessly.
They were hit by a car.
One of them died on the spot. The other, managed to sit down, and was taken to the hospital. He looked fine at first, but died three hours later.
Below is the link to the entry.
spinning
It was drizzling this morning.
I was on the way to work.
As I entered the entrance of the university at the Linguistic faculty, I was listening to one song from the musical Wicked; Defying Gravity. There is some kind of inspiration in the lyrics.
I'm through accepting limits
'Cause someone says they're so
Some things I cannot change
But till I try, I'll never know
Too long I've been afraid of
Losing love I guess I've lost
Well, if that's love
It comes at much too high a cost
I'd sooner buy
Defying gravity
Kiss me goodbye
I'm defying gravity
And you can't pull me down
When my heart was blooming with high spirits, and as I take a right turned, following the curvy upward road-
At just the right speed, the right degree of slant, the right moment-
My bike slowly skidded, the whole world was moving awkwardly, and I was slowly thrown on the ground.
Too bad I was not on the grass.
I laid down there, facing the sky, facing the trees. My bike lay down there on the opposite side of the road, its engine muttered softly, and died.
I just lay there for a minute. Darn.
Two guys went out of their car and helped me. I was alright.
List of damages:
Bloody left palm.
Superficial cuts on my left elbow and knee and there is like a hickey on my left chest.
A small tear on my pants. My clothes are wet now.
And lo and behold; my Seiko is having its ugly scratch again, and the WHOLE back of my NEW mp3 player is scratched. I should have bought the cute small sachet earlier to protect it.
I was more towards thinking analytically than being upset. That made me uncomfortable.
I was thinking: What is the lesson learnt behind this?
-No matter that you think you are careful, sometimes you are not careful enough. Ride extremely slow at curvy turns especially when the road is wet and slippery.
-It is IMPORTANT to buy a case of protection for your gadgets.
-I was given the perfect dose of taste on how did my friend felt whenever he accidentally thrown his expensive phone on the rough road.
-The experience was half bad, and half funny. Weird.
starry starry nite
Z may not be a hot life guard with pecs and chest.
Z may not be the drop dead gorgeous topless model that could make me collapse to the ground.
Z is not hot stuff. Z is not perfect. But one thing for sure, Z is good stuff.
Z is the kind of person that I would prefer to be with for a very, very long time. And yeah, in fact, for the time being, Z is the one who stayed in my life for more than just a week like my other flings did.
Yesterday, I purposely made my whole day free to meet Z. I waited and I got bored. When night fell, I got really mad. He actually napped half the whole day after doing his chores.
But spending the night together was fun. That night we stared at the black sky and the red clouds. And we gazed at the stars. We saw the three stars aligned together; the Orion belt.
Perhaps I am not with a Hong Kong star. But I am with someone special, who would want to gaze at stars and chat. With me.
problems at work
Have you ever done online university subject registration? It sounds so simple right? Just go to the website, check what subjects are being offered, and then sign in your id to register your subjects.
But on the university staff side, this is a complicated process.
To begin with, there are three departments which will have to get involved.
First, the registration section, where the staff handles the payment, and teaches the students to use the computer to get registered online, and also people who generate the matric card number.
Second, would be the IT department, who will be constantly pressured by the registration section, each time the online system go crazy and got a lot of errors.
Third, is the faculty offices, and they would be chased by the registration section, when they never update the courses to be offered each semester.
And a lot of time I had to contact the people from the IT department and the faculty offices to carry out their job properly. Stupidness you know.
But on the university staff side, this is a complicated process.
To begin with, there are three departments which will have to get involved.
First, the registration section, where the staff handles the payment, and teaches the students to use the computer to get registered online, and also people who generate the matric card number.
Second, would be the IT department, who will be constantly pressured by the registration section, each time the online system go crazy and got a lot of errors.
Third, is the faculty offices, and they would be chased by the registration section, when they never update the courses to be offered each semester.
And a lot of time I had to contact the people from the IT department and the faculty offices to carry out their job properly. Stupidness you know.
i am like a free lancer
Today I am recruited as a temporary staff to assist the registration process of postgraduate students.
For the morning session, I was assigned to stand by at the computer terminals where these students are supposed to register their subjects online.
It was fun to teach them on how to create their own university email account, and it was a small satisfaction when they all raised their hands just to get my attention. With my charming smile and dazzling friendliness, I caught their interest. Don’t envy me because I am blonde ya, everyone.
And of course, I gave extra attention to those cute Chinese lads, most of them are from the Business Faculty. Hik.
Besides that, we also are having free breakfast and lunch for these few weeks working here. Ain’t that nice.
Right now, I am at another section for the afternoon session. My task is to be here in front of this PC, and new students would come to me for me to generate their matric number. Apart of handling a very easy task, while waiting for the number to generate, I got the chance to talk to a few interesting students.
One is a student from Aceh, and he told me that his sister and the son was swept away by the wave. The rest of the family were thankfully safe. He was in Medan at that time.
Another one is a guy from Laos, yummy, and I told him, my friend, Babi-Hu, had just flew to Bangkok and will be in Laos a few days from now for vacation. At least Babi-Hu can be a subject for me to make myself popular. Haha. Talk about taking advantage.
I am having fun today.
For the morning session, I was assigned to stand by at the computer terminals where these students are supposed to register their subjects online.
It was fun to teach them on how to create their own university email account, and it was a small satisfaction when they all raised their hands just to get my attention. With my charming smile and dazzling friendliness, I caught their interest. Don’t envy me because I am blonde ya, everyone.
And of course, I gave extra attention to those cute Chinese lads, most of them are from the Business Faculty. Hik.
Besides that, we also are having free breakfast and lunch for these few weeks working here. Ain’t that nice.
Right now, I am at another section for the afternoon session. My task is to be here in front of this PC, and new students would come to me for me to generate their matric number. Apart of handling a very easy task, while waiting for the number to generate, I got the chance to talk to a few interesting students.
One is a student from Aceh, and he told me that his sister and the son was swept away by the wave. The rest of the family were thankfully safe. He was in Medan at that time.
Another one is a guy from Laos, yummy, and I told him, my friend, Babi-Hu, had just flew to Bangkok and will be in Laos a few days from now for vacation. At least Babi-Hu can be a subject for me to make myself popular. Haha. Talk about taking advantage.
I am having fun today.
music is life
When I was thirteen, I started of with a conventional Sony Cassette Walkman without any bass even. I moved forward to another one with Mega Bass, and another with Dolby System.Then I bought five hundred worth of Sony Digital Walkman, which was the hippest portable player at that time. Some gang robbed it off from me at a lane in KL, in the eve of Merdeka.
I replaced it with a cheaper Aiwa, and wrapped it in plastic bag so that it won't get scratches at all.
After entering university, I started off with a Sony Discman. It has a very nice bass, never distorted, and had a nice remote control on the earphones.
That one got stolen when I left it in front of the lecture hall in my sling bag.
I stopped listening to music and then I bought myself the most expensive portable that I had in my life, a Sony MD Player. It has very loud volume, and very strong bass that I ever had experienced. It cost me a thousand bucks.
But handling it is a bit flimsy, with the MiniDiscs and all, and I lend it to my friend who help me lose it. I bet it's stolen.
When I am finishing my final year, I started appreciating mp3 technology.
My first Creative Mp3 Player, got spoilt when I tugged it off from my computer without clicking "Remove Drive" Icon.
My second one is a red Samsung Yepp, with the sound comparable to a Sony, if only that it has no distortion of the bass.
My red Yepp was loyal to me for two years. Then it started to get spoiled.
Now, I had to buy a decent Creative MuVo, blue color, worth 200 bucks.
Quite happy with it.
Music has been soundtracking my life anytime I am on the go.
When I am bored and doomed.
When I am mad and sad.
When I am happy and high.
Can't imagine living with no music.
My friend said, after I bought my latest mp3 player:
"Congratulations! You have bought back your life."
That is so true.
brilliant!
Yes, I had practiced the concept of backstabbing front stance.
Backstabbing front stance: Degrading people in front of their face without their knowledge.
Today, I hang out with Babi-Hu at a mall nearby. Then I started a casual conversation with her.
Blonde Me: Ey, whenever there are unfinished food in some rich family’s party, what do they do with it?
Babi-Hu: Usually the caterer will take them back, but most of the time the food will be finished off right?
Blonde Me: Back in my school, the workers will send the left over and rubbish at the dining hall to the truck to be sent to the pig farm. Pigs really eat everything you know.
Babi-Hu: (Not aware at all of the fishy conversation) No wonder the local pork tastes bad.
Blonde-Me: (Knowing that Babi-Hu likes to eat muruku) Once my friend went to Korea, and a pig at the farm gobbled his muruku up. Even the thick plastic packet was eaten off. But wild boars are scarier. They can wallop a whole banana tree.
Babi-Hu: I went to a forest reserve a few years ago and a wild boar was so close to us.
Blonde-Me: *Eh? You sure you’re not looking at the mirror?* I think if rich people are bored, they can keep a baby boar as a pet. But you must cut off the ‘benda’ first. And then the ball-less boar can be tamed and effeminate. And guess what they can call their new pet?
Babi-Hu: What?
Blonde-Me: Babi-Hu Sally-Su. And they can play fetch, “Here Sally, Sally, fetch!”
Both of us just laughed at my own silly jokes.
Brilliant!
my first gig
Yesterday was a colorful one.
I started the day getting out of bed to read the phone text sent by Z. Actually I was not really sleeping well, being quarter awake the whole night. Anyway, the rest was still enough for me to be out in the morning to have breakfast with Z at his Subang town.
Then I went to KL for a swim. It has been a while. It was nice to swim at the seventies Chinese pool again. You can wear colorful polka dots retro swimming trunk there too if you want.
I went back home to hang my swimming trunk to dry, and dashed out with my bike hat and jacket to go and buy groceries. Money is really scarce nowadays, so I wanted to buy sausages, bread and baked beans for dinner everyday. Healthy and economical.
Dashing out of the house resulted me accidentally leaving the keys inside the house. Everyone please give a big clap hand.
I called my housemate and he was out at Times Square. There’s no way he’s going back early, two cities apart, just to hand me a piece of house key.
I pondered a while and hesitated, but finally decided to take public transport and meet another friend because he also has the key.
At first I wanted to take the cab, but there was a bus.
I went aboard, after the conductor confidently said that they will stop at Kerinchi; the condo where my friend stays.
The bus took its sweet time to have a tour at Uptown Damansara, SS2 Damansara, and Asia Jaya. When I thought we almost reaching there, it just went pass MegaMall without even stopping at Kerinchi. I ended up following the rest of the passengers going down the bus at Central Market, and took an LRT there straight to my friends condo.
Talk about convenience. I wasted two hours.
After getting the key, I head home by a cab. There was no time to buy groceries or even catch a breath. I had to wallop my chicken rice and bath, to meet Babi-Hu for our final practice and performance that evening.
Our performance was just me with the trumpet, Babi-Hu with the saxophone, and another girl with her keyboard. We had to play Christmas songs and also other pop tunes to entertain the guests at a Christmas party of a very rich family.
The house was colonial British, white-washed, on a hill. The husband and wife are CEOs of a bank, and all who came were the classy people.
There was a bar, where the maid would pour bottomless red and white wine, and also orange juice for the non-drinker. There was a cute Pan Asian Chinese waiter with blue eyes, offering people a glass of drink. All of the maids and waiters wore their red and white Christmas hats.
Asean paintings were hung everywhere, and one which caught me was the one with green and red parrots. Small porcelain English dolls wearing dresses were arranged on the glass rack.
The furniture setting is of antique British India wooden racks, and modern cream colored sofas. There were few huge Christmas trees inside the house, and white canopies for those who prefer to eat outside.
After a while playing music, suddenly the crowd gathered and sang along Christmas songs with us. Some were high on wine, and they all even danced. The crowd really enjoyed themselves.
When we have done our job entertaining the guest, we packed our instruments and went to the table where they have the food. Imagine this huge whole poached salmon at the center of the table. One small chunk of that would have already cost me a one day expenditure. I straight away took a plate and ate the salmon with three different dressings until I was full. Besides that, they also have strawberries dipped in chocolate. Talk about indulgence.
As I entered back the house, the host had turned their mini compo on. It was a small sized Bose CD player, similar of the size of a shoebox; but the sound was amazing. It was like listening to a big hi-fi. Impressive.
After the party ended, I went home and got myself prepared to hit a club in KL. I really missed dancing. Although it was kind of late, but I felt that I really must go.
I went all alone into a sleazy club, but that did not affect the fun at all. The club was packed with people, and one guy even daringly touched me. But I did not allow him to go further though, because I think that was too much. Haha.
And beyond my expectations, I suddenly bumped into my close friend and his partner, and I was really happy. What a pleasant surprise.
Since I came to the bar late, I had little time to dance before it finally closed for the night. I had coffee with my friend, but he had to go back home early.
Finally. I decided to go to another mamak shop where all the guys would flock with their gang, checking out everyone else there. Alone, I sat by one table, slouching, drinking coffee, and smoke cigarettes.
I observed people around me.
There was this table of four hearing impaired guys of my kind. They were expressively gossiping among each other. I could imagine that beyond the silence, without verbal sound, it is actually really noisy in their own world. I wondered how did they enjoy being in the club with all the rest of the people. Perhaps they appreciated the thumping sensation and the wild lights as they jump on the dance floor with the rest.
One pretty queen entered the restaurant and she had muscular, smooth fair skinned legs. Uniquely, these pair of legs really fit her; like Madonna and her well-toned arms.
It was really fun chilling out.
I arrived home in the morning, took a shower … and went to bed. Yeah, what a day.
I started the day getting out of bed to read the phone text sent by Z. Actually I was not really sleeping well, being quarter awake the whole night. Anyway, the rest was still enough for me to be out in the morning to have breakfast with Z at his Subang town.
Then I went to KL for a swim. It has been a while. It was nice to swim at the seventies Chinese pool again. You can wear colorful polka dots retro swimming trunk there too if you want.
I went back home to hang my swimming trunk to dry, and dashed out with my bike hat and jacket to go and buy groceries. Money is really scarce nowadays, so I wanted to buy sausages, bread and baked beans for dinner everyday. Healthy and economical.
Dashing out of the house resulted me accidentally leaving the keys inside the house. Everyone please give a big clap hand.
I called my housemate and he was out at Times Square. There’s no way he’s going back early, two cities apart, just to hand me a piece of house key.
I pondered a while and hesitated, but finally decided to take public transport and meet another friend because he also has the key.
At first I wanted to take the cab, but there was a bus.
I went aboard, after the conductor confidently said that they will stop at Kerinchi; the condo where my friend stays.
The bus took its sweet time to have a tour at Uptown Damansara, SS2 Damansara, and Asia Jaya. When I thought we almost reaching there, it just went pass MegaMall without even stopping at Kerinchi. I ended up following the rest of the passengers going down the bus at Central Market, and took an LRT there straight to my friends condo.
Talk about convenience. I wasted two hours.
After getting the key, I head home by a cab. There was no time to buy groceries or even catch a breath. I had to wallop my chicken rice and bath, to meet Babi-Hu for our final practice and performance that evening.
Our performance was just me with the trumpet, Babi-Hu with the saxophone, and another girl with her keyboard. We had to play Christmas songs and also other pop tunes to entertain the guests at a Christmas party of a very rich family.
The house was colonial British, white-washed, on a hill. The husband and wife are CEOs of a bank, and all who came were the classy people.
There was a bar, where the maid would pour bottomless red and white wine, and also orange juice for the non-drinker. There was a cute Pan Asian Chinese waiter with blue eyes, offering people a glass of drink. All of the maids and waiters wore their red and white Christmas hats.
Asean paintings were hung everywhere, and one which caught me was the one with green and red parrots. Small porcelain English dolls wearing dresses were arranged on the glass rack.
The furniture setting is of antique British India wooden racks, and modern cream colored sofas. There were few huge Christmas trees inside the house, and white canopies for those who prefer to eat outside.
After a while playing music, suddenly the crowd gathered and sang along Christmas songs with us. Some were high on wine, and they all even danced. The crowd really enjoyed themselves.
When we have done our job entertaining the guest, we packed our instruments and went to the table where they have the food. Imagine this huge whole poached salmon at the center of the table. One small chunk of that would have already cost me a one day expenditure. I straight away took a plate and ate the salmon with three different dressings until I was full. Besides that, they also have strawberries dipped in chocolate. Talk about indulgence.
As I entered back the house, the host had turned their mini compo on. It was a small sized Bose CD player, similar of the size of a shoebox; but the sound was amazing. It was like listening to a big hi-fi. Impressive.
After the party ended, I went home and got myself prepared to hit a club in KL. I really missed dancing. Although it was kind of late, but I felt that I really must go.
I went all alone into a sleazy club, but that did not affect the fun at all. The club was packed with people, and one guy even daringly touched me. But I did not allow him to go further though, because I think that was too much. Haha.
And beyond my expectations, I suddenly bumped into my close friend and his partner, and I was really happy. What a pleasant surprise.
Since I came to the bar late, I had little time to dance before it finally closed for the night. I had coffee with my friend, but he had to go back home early.
Finally. I decided to go to another mamak shop where all the guys would flock with their gang, checking out everyone else there. Alone, I sat by one table, slouching, drinking coffee, and smoke cigarettes.
I observed people around me.
There was this table of four hearing impaired guys of my kind. They were expressively gossiping among each other. I could imagine that beyond the silence, without verbal sound, it is actually really noisy in their own world. I wondered how did they enjoy being in the club with all the rest of the people. Perhaps they appreciated the thumping sensation and the wild lights as they jump on the dance floor with the rest.
One pretty queen entered the restaurant and she had muscular, smooth fair skinned legs. Uniquely, these pair of legs really fit her; like Madonna and her well-toned arms.
It was really fun chilling out.
I arrived home in the morning, took a shower … and went to bed. Yeah, what a day.
i think i am on cloud nine
One friend has a steady boyfriend but he still gets laid with other people whenever convenient.
Another friend has a steady boyfriend but he has another fan whom he have now as his pet brother.
Another friend has a steady boyfriend but flirts on the net ‘harmlessly’ with his messenger contact.
Another person that I know cheats his own self by having dates with multiple guys who do not seem to be promising at all.
The funny thing is; these different friends are against what each other have done.
Everyone does have the tendency of facing a situation of liking or being liked by another person outside his relationship. It’s just the way how we respond to it that counts.
As for me, I am experiencing it first time, recently.
I attended this birthday party of a friend that I knew from the net. We met twice and we stayed as friends, perhaps because of lack of chemistry to go further than that.
It was just a plain simple closed party, and it was not done in a ballroom even. Instead, my friend checked in a room suite and invited everyone there.
I was shy at first, being present in the middle of his crowd of friends that I do not know. Most of the time, I was just eating quietly and observed the whole party. They all had fun and there was even a cake cutting ceremony.
When I was observing, I noticed this one Chinese guy who is quite cute. Only when they cut the cake I realized that he was my friend’s boyfriend, and they took photos of my friend being fed by boyfriend with a slice of cake.
Only when the crowd got smaller as the night getting late, the shy cute boyfriend suddenly had a chat with me. That time I suddenly see that this person is not only cute, but super cute. And apparently he’s a Malay guy with really strong Chinese features.
The chat went too personal when we were talking about our dreams in career life, and he even started to ask what number I am in the siblings of my family. Perhaps it was just me, but I felt that this conversation went a bit deep.
And then this super cute guy even asked me to take photos with him; only the two of us. He hugged me and I felt really awkward and rigid. Heck, he did have hots for me as the same that I have the likings to him.
And as it was at two in the morning already, the people left were just me, my birthday friend and his boyfriend, and another insignificant guy who fell asleep on the hotel bed.
I felt really difficult to leave, furthermore when the cute guy insisted me to stay ‘because it’s kinda late and you are riding a bike’.
Anyway. I had to ask to leave, and we all shook hands goodnight, and he even had the chance to try my imitation Crocs.
Perhaps our luck did not cross together. Both of us have boyfriends, and our lucks just went parallel.
Soft heavenly eyes gazed into me
Transcending space and time
And I was rendered still
There were no words for me to find at all
As I stood there beside myself
I could see you and no one else
When I saw you
When I saw you
I could not breathe
I fell so deep
When I saw you
When I saw you
I'd never be
I'd never be the same
Another friend has a steady boyfriend but he has another fan whom he have now as his pet brother.
Another friend has a steady boyfriend but flirts on the net ‘harmlessly’ with his messenger contact.
Another person that I know cheats his own self by having dates with multiple guys who do not seem to be promising at all.
The funny thing is; these different friends are against what each other have done.
Everyone does have the tendency of facing a situation of liking or being liked by another person outside his relationship. It’s just the way how we respond to it that counts.
As for me, I am experiencing it first time, recently.
I attended this birthday party of a friend that I knew from the net. We met twice and we stayed as friends, perhaps because of lack of chemistry to go further than that.
It was just a plain simple closed party, and it was not done in a ballroom even. Instead, my friend checked in a room suite and invited everyone there.
I was shy at first, being present in the middle of his crowd of friends that I do not know. Most of the time, I was just eating quietly and observed the whole party. They all had fun and there was even a cake cutting ceremony.
When I was observing, I noticed this one Chinese guy who is quite cute. Only when they cut the cake I realized that he was my friend’s boyfriend, and they took photos of my friend being fed by boyfriend with a slice of cake.
Only when the crowd got smaller as the night getting late, the shy cute boyfriend suddenly had a chat with me. That time I suddenly see that this person is not only cute, but super cute. And apparently he’s a Malay guy with really strong Chinese features.
The chat went too personal when we were talking about our dreams in career life, and he even started to ask what number I am in the siblings of my family. Perhaps it was just me, but I felt that this conversation went a bit deep.
And then this super cute guy even asked me to take photos with him; only the two of us. He hugged me and I felt really awkward and rigid. Heck, he did have hots for me as the same that I have the likings to him.
And as it was at two in the morning already, the people left were just me, my birthday friend and his boyfriend, and another insignificant guy who fell asleep on the hotel bed.
I felt really difficult to leave, furthermore when the cute guy insisted me to stay ‘because it’s kinda late and you are riding a bike’.
Anyway. I had to ask to leave, and we all shook hands goodnight, and he even had the chance to try my imitation Crocs.
Perhaps our luck did not cross together. Both of us have boyfriends, and our lucks just went parallel.
Soft heavenly eyes gazed into me
Transcending space and time
And I was rendered still
There were no words for me to find at all
As I stood there beside myself
I could see you and no one else
When I saw you
When I saw you
I could not breathe
I fell so deep
When I saw you
When I saw you
I'd never be
I'd never be the same
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